Hi Peter, sorry there's a wi fi issue. I'm good. How are you? Yes, fine. Thank you. You just sent me something I already told the I'm already communicating with it for a long time, but essentially allow. Let me just download this, and then I can click, so the file name isn't valid. Why not? Okay. Sorry, what were you saying? Oh, Yeah, I was saying literally like because there's an issue for class. I but they don't know why. Sorry the reception is not great again unfortunately. So you you were coming in and out so could you just because like the wife the wife fi doesn't work for classes and I also keep communicating with my school it but they actually don't know what went wrong but they were like solving this issue. Okay. Okay. All right. So right. So how's your week been? It's been very busy and I think I got like a cold today. I cata cold. Have you. Where are you now? Where are you at the moment? Somewhere in your study, I'm still in the common room because there's like signal, but the signal is better than in my room. Why are you in the common room with other girls? No, because they were not here at the moment. But like I think they will understand the issue. Yeah. So you've got the common room to yourself. Okay. Yeah, Yeah. Okay. So what's happened this week for you? Anything special? I mean, let me think, Yeah, this week is literally I just submit my Durham scholarship on Friday. And Yeah, I was and then I was cracking out with my revision thingy. I think there's a lot of work cracking on. It's a good cracking on. But Yeah, we still have like loads of content for the usa. Sorry, loads of content to study for the usa. Finish no. Right. Okay. I'm just waiting to open here we are sorry, Peter two might if I go to the toilet really quick. Yeah so this is basically the 25 marker I've done in the usa mock exam. Okay, and for this one I only got like 16 out of 25, which is my teacher said which which is good, but I think I can still like improve it definitely. Okay. Well, where's where's the actual essay? My hand, I think my handwriting will be like hard for you to read, but like literally that's what I've written. I just memorize the plan and written it. Title or do you want to read my extra essays? I don't know if you can read my handwriting, though. Yes, I do. I do want to see what you actually did. You see, how can I share this with. Sorry Peter, I might into quit and then upload it too, okay? About be God, please, please, please. Hi, sorry, Peter. I tried multiple times. It's still not working. Wish, shame. Sorry, I'm very frustrated with so I you take a picture of it, then upload it. Photograph. 美，你好，能进来吗？你建议我宝宝，你建在吗？在上课的他那个聚差那个网。那个能wi吗哦，可以，我的他那个I我我听到我的就是呃你哪个哪个能进他对喂，但是他那个呃我这个这个app用不了，任何用不了，只能用sigsig就两，然后一直卡。没法我的输备你。哦，没事，就是我以为你自己买了个WiFi的东，但他就是只能连。哦，那没事没事没事没事，不打扰你了。Hi, Peter, can you hear me? Where are you off to now? Hi, Peter. You're back where you were. Happy Peter can now. Yeah, that's good. That's loud. Okay, fine. Yeah, shall we just I couldn't upload the control. By basically memand, then write down everything I can memorize in the exam. All right, okay, okay. Can you can you give me the heading though the title of this essay? Yes, yes, I would type it. Sorry. Can you give me the Oh you sorry, you already give me the. Thank. So don't just try to understand. So when did you to this was the exam. Was it mock exam? Yeah, this is a mock exam. And then this is the essay plan that I've written for the question that actually came up in the exam. Okay, so this was this was nothing to this is nothing to do with the exam. No, this is an essay plan that I've written for one question that came up in the am. Yeah, that's right. So it wasn't during the exam you had the same title some other time and this was the plan you wrote and then it came up in the exam. Yeah because we've been told there's we've been told what question is going to come up. Like there's like for example that give us like five questions and three of them is going to come up. Yeah and you scored 16 out of 24. Oh, 25, 25. Okay, 16. All right. So this to me it's very detailed, but there's some things I'm sorry, I don't know what it means. So I. Would talk about this, okay? But that's not to say some of this isn't wrong. It's just. Like this. Oh, because I've used tragedy for my plans, but like I refined them multiple times. Yeah I was trying to find Yeah something. You I use as normal sort of I saw something. I thought, what does that mean? So you got to be careful. It wears a good, you know. You know, this sounds good. Gosh, it sounds very clever, but what does it mean? Look at this structurally restrictive. This is this is up here. I will try again to upload the actual exam on. It's a spelling mistake there. Fetal rights, I think spelling mistake. Can you not take a picture, a photograph with your phone? The thing is, I couldn't upload it. The WiFi doesn't allow me to upload. I doesn't even allow that. Yes, it's literally the most annoying. Sorry, let me just try it again. Okay, shall we go through it first? Where I was like, Oh gosh, Yeah, I will try to. She lost what I was looking at. Thank God. What? But I wasn't sure of this refined synthesis. Oh, basically Peter, we have we have a structure. So so basically our structure is, so to say, like your argument first and then say the counter argument right before the counter argument. The counter argument that in the centhesis, Yeah how long did you write? How long did you have to write for this? So there it's two hours 30 minute for this one for this no, no, no, no for the whole paper. Yeah so this is like about 4045 minutes 40 minutes because that would be normal. Okay, so you just Yeah so I look at this and I think cool. I go straight to the dates. It's literally the whole pair. Yeah, Yeah and I think I go of that. My answer is I've got an then how far do we agree? Okay, so I need to know the arguto not remain the same. I need to know the reasons, and I need to know throughout this period. And I'm doing that just to show you the whole period. So basically, we've got 127. 27 years. Yeah Yeah the reasons for opposition to okay equality between men and women remain the same. Well, the answer is simple. No, no, but that's overall, isn't it? Yeah, overall, no, but some reasons did. But but. Importance. Changed. Okay Peter it seems like the picture I've uploaded have I have been successfully uploaded the picture if you can see good this will help a lot. Let me just have a look. Great. Oh let me test the order Hanon because I've got one here so you can you up save it can can you start on the third third picture? Yeah I'm going save it ignore the first. From the third picture and then. I think and then load the upload five of them. Oh, I see it done. The more. So Yeah, only from the third picture and then upload five pictures because some of them are repetitive. Which one do you want me to? I've got the one with a mark. 23 out of 30. Is it that one you want? No, Peter, from the third picture. The third picture. Okay, that's Yeah. Yeah, sorry. It is 23. That one you can see. Can you see what I'm looking at? Well, why don't I share the board? Will that work? No, that's not going to work, is it? I don't think that works if I share the board. Third except question three No But why am I raising the hand? So from the third picture can you when you say third picture, I'm not sure what you mean by third picture. It's the one that have the twenties to mark on it like the one you just said. Yeah Yeah and then load the upload this picture and the four picture after the 23 hthirty page. I think I've just downloaded that你那配。Alina. First. Alina first and then one okay save. I'm going to upload that okay. Oh I see what you've done. I've seen the first okay, sorry you've sent me several so only from the third pictures and then from the third pictures upload the Yeah five pictures only Yeah done the first one okay, I'll do the second one now he just booked ticks so he did sorry Peter it's a bit I want to see comments Alina Yeah he that's why he didn't actually put like that much comment. No, it shows he didn't really read it. You know he didn't really read it. I'll do the third. So I'm doing the third one now and then I'll do the last one. Yes. If you've saved five pictures in total, I'm going. Gosh, you've written a lot, don't you? Oh, this is four. Yeah, I've written five pages for this. Alright, right, the fifth hopefully is the mark. Yes, 16, yes, we got there. Great job. Oh my God. You know, first of this month, and this is five, isn't it? Yeah, okay, let's get back to the board and I can start uploading. What all uploaded uploaded. What? Load mile. Cried Elina. One. Open. It opquickly. Is that right? Do we start with that? You remember what he said, your teacher. On the last page, see. Right, Elina, I'm just going to. Alina, this is important. Yes, Yeah, they they said they couldn't read my handwriting. No, it's first impression. Okay. When you look at so this is the question. Okay. What's your first impression of this? Your first yes, sorry, I know, I know I will improve that. Okay. This I know sounds a bit silly, but it's just you know whoever's marking it is not a robot. Yeah and humans will be nice to the people that they're night who are nice to them. That's the way we are. However, Yeah you know that's just the way the world is. So you look at this and you think this student has just look at this squiggle, I thinking this isn't right. You know, I can't give them a high mark because so you kind of need, look, you kind of need, I don't know, section three. Okay. Yeah, like I want to underline it with a ruler. Okay, okay. And then I leave a line. I leave a line and then I write three dot in the margin. Yeah, okay. So that's it's simple and it shows. I'm trying to do it correctly. Look, I'm helping the marker. So you're creating because a lot of them won't. I mean, a lot of them could be like this. So I put this three on the left hand side. Yeah you put it in in the margin here. So you put dot dot you know and you say, this student is really good. Okay, they put a dot, which you should do. Oh sorry, it's it's section b isn't it not it's section b. Yeah all right. Immediately you're creating a good impression. You've got the marker on your side. They're not thinking this is messy. You see, that's difficult to read. Look, sorry. Shall I read it out for you? No, no, I can read it, but it's written. Written. Can you can actually read it. It's written. Look, this word. Do you understand? Slap slap dash. So it's like. Yeah I will improve my handwriting. My teacher said they couldn't read it. Yeah, they have to guess this. The reasons for but so straight away, if I was marking this, and remember, the teacher is very busy. Yeah okay. They've got lots of things to do and they're kind of saying. Yeah, Yeah, I would improve my handwriting. Yeah, Yeah. I know you've said that, but I'm just trying to sort of show you you want me to give you high Marks and you do all this? No. All right, now let's get on to the actual answer. So your first paragraph is just so important, as you know. Now where's your let's get the title again. Oh no, we have to did the opposition change for that period? Okay. So I'm looking now did the reason for opposition Yeah. Now remember I highlighted can I move this down? I don't know. Can I. Can I move this off to the app now? What did I highlight? You're the duration. Yeah. So the question has given you specific dates and they've given you therefore. Okay. And I look at your first paragraph and I'm thinking I'm looking. Yes. Oh Yeah, because all question was is phrased like that for the usa. That's just a whole period. Yeah I will add that time to it. All you have to do, Lina, you see the question is referring to dates. Do that. Okay? They all do that. So you need to refer to the dates in your fake paragraph. And I quickly look, no, there doesn't seem to be a reference to the period. That's not the actual date as this period. Okay. So you need to so you need to address this point in your first ara. Okay, you must you must because these are Marks. Okay? It's so important. So where we going here? I'm going to get rid of these. Oh, by the way, Peter, you asked for my teacher's comment. Do you want me to type it first? Yes, that will be we're there in one of the pages, aren't they? We'll see. But it's ant it's get there. I just want to just give you my impression. Then we'll see what your teacher says. I think your teacher was a bit rushed. I think so as well. Well, it's bound to be because they've got essays to mark and they haven't got much time and they're really busy doing other things. Okay, so I so that was one thing this period, right? The reasons. Gender equality remained the same throughout, you see, and my answer, my instinct is to say, no way. No, they can't remain the same. You you could have one or two, but they're not. The relative importance would change. I'll explain that. Yes. Yes, but you're right. You know in 1865, this might have been the number one reason and it's still kind of a bit of a reason in 1992, but it's not the same importance in this period. All right, so you've got the reasons, but the importance will have altered your number one in 1860. It's not number one. 127 years later, it's still a reason, but it's not the big one. And if you say that, it just shows this is a student who's really understand who's thinking. So we are talking about the mainstream opposition value, right? But it just says the reasons. It could say the main reasons, just says the reasons. So we'll come on to that. How far you do? Green ener, this is the key as well, but you need to set it out. What are the reasons? Which ones changed, which didn't, which are still important for. That. And then at the end, you see how far you agree that's the structure. Are you happy with that when you're saying which is still important? You mean it's still held by like a majority of it? Well, you know yes, that's if that's what you think. Yeah. Okay, but you know, the opposition, I mean, really, what are we talking about here? Are we talking about everybody? Are we talking about the politicians? You know, which your position, everyone well, you see to a clever student will say, look in, in, in in the country socially, you know, people, they have their views. But the important thing here is the politicians. What did they think? They're more important than somebody who lives in Alaska. What I'm saying, you're smart. You're showing us some thinking that the reader is impressed with your ability to look at this question. And. All right, so that makes sense. So the reasons for opposition to gender equality in the us, I wouldn't put the usa why you dare have to do that. You see. So all I'm trying to show you is that we're now onto the second line. And it takes us here. Now, what have you done here? Grammar mistake, it looks like it remained. Did not remain the same, not remain the same. It's a didn't see look, did not remain Oh here, sorry, I have bigger puyou have mentioned the period. So you have throughout this period, I would probably add this. Okay. Just to show look, it's 127 years. You've asked me just to show I know, you know. Throughout the period for all three rights. That's interesting because that's what we normally broke. We break the paragraph down into those three writes. I quite like that, but you're adding quite a lot here. The proposition did not remain the same on for all three rights. And I'm thinking, right, you know, you need to explain that, including civil rights. What's this question? Well, just go back to this question where we talking about gender equality? Okay, yes, civil rights for all three rights including civil rights, freedom, legal Oh Yeah can shall I read it? Yeah legal something and right to own property and that's it. Is it? No Carry on. So where does this sentence finish here? Yeah, Yeah, well, what do you look? Yeah what do you notice there? So what are you trying to do? La wps? Clarity. And you're dealing with quite a lot of information and you're trying to make it clear. And you're trying to give a lot of information in your first sentence. So that's your seventh line. A lot of information in one line, seven lines, one sentence, seven lines. Is that clear? Because my teacher, telus, that we must define. Yes, I think he should. I think you should. I think I agree. So what would I do here? What would I do? There's are lots of ways. So I would then define this. And their quality. Yeah so you kind of sing to the examiner. You can't talk to the examiner. But the way you said, you say, look, first of all, to answer your question, I need to I need to tell you what I think gender equality means. Okay? So you're kind of saying it. Look, to answer your question, I need to tell you I need to define what I think is gender equality. Now, once I've told you that, I will then tell you if I think the reasons for the opposition, for all three each in turn, remain the same throughout this period. So I'm going to tell you those three things, okay? And then at the end, I'm going to say, how far do I agree with the question? And that's what it is. And that's my first paragraph. So the reader knows exactly what I'm thinking of. And all I then have to do is to give more details, more evidence for each of the points I made. All right, so you first define gender equality, right? Yeah. So it's all about gender equality. And you've said there are three ways of three components. So I'm going to say, I can't just talk about gender equality. I need to tell you that it's made up of three things, politics. Yeah income. I can't assume you agree with me about gender accori'm going to tell you this is how I'm going to judge, reach a decision on your question that I need to tell you what what I think gender equality means. And I think so far in your first page said, well, there are three elements to it. Okay, so first of all, I need to define what I think gender equality means. So there are three elements to it. And then I'm gonna to look at the opposition over this period. Each of those three elements, okay okay, so thatbe a sentence each. And then my last sentence of my first paragraphs. Well, do I agree with the question? Like us overall, I could say, well lit it on on one of those, the reasons why we were largely the same throughout this period. For the second one, they completely changed over this period. But the third gender equality criteria, you know the element, it was a kind of mixture. There was this change but substantially the same e, but there were some key changes. And I might so the second sentence, let's look at, are we talking about society overall? Or are we talking about the political decision makers, Congress, the president? How did how did they view it? Because they're more important than someone living in Alaska. In America, okay, Alaska is part of America, but it's stuck up north of Canada. And if you know that it's part of America, you know they're part of the usa. So what were we saying? And sorry, so what are we saying in the second sentence? Like to lay out the opposition, right, for each of those gender? Quite. Let's come back to what you wrote because you say there are three. Three civil rights. Three rights. Yeah. Okay. So you you deal with each in turn. So you say these are to answer your question, we need to look at what makes gender equality basically for women, isn't it? What makes the corright? Well, there are three elements. So you got to tell right there, these are the three elements that you need to consider when answering this question. And then you wouldn't say when answering this question, you could do but youuse their words, the words from the question. So the three elements of gender equality that I will be analyzing. And then youname them are critical in order to reach, reach earan opinion, reach a judgment, reach my answer to your question, to this question, but I wouldn't say this question. I write out the reasons for opposition, had they changed. So I need to look, or you can say look, to answer this question, I will need to look at the three elements, three parts of gender equality, which are, which are try and get it down in one set which are, that's your first sentence. To answer this question, I need to state what are the three elements of gender equality? Okay, then you take the most important. Normally it's the most important. Doesn't matter. Then you say, right, the opposition to this element, let's try and get which is your first one? Civil rights, freedom. Is that right? Civil rights. Yeah freedom. Yeah legal protection rights, your own property. Okay. Is that three. Yeah I say four. What about political rights as four isn't it? No, civil rights is different. Civil rights what do you mean? Well you've got three remember you say three rights okay. Well you've got civil rights legal right? No, no that's that that all us under a civil rights civil rights an umbrella okay. Well see once again, keep it clear. Keep it do I keep it clear? Because you see three rights here and I've got one right here I've got another right there I've got political rights and it looks like I've got more coming up. I don't know. You see there's only civil political and social on Yeah you've got to make it so clear clarity clear. So the second thing in this to lay out the opposition views, right? Well, okay, I don't want to say this is what you've got to do but you just got to answer the question, right? Yeah to determine if the reasons remained unchanged over this 127 year period. You see I just sounds confident if there reason me are I it is helpful to set out the important elements elements or parts of gender equality. Sorry, something like that. Or if you want to shorten it is it's helpful. I will. Yeah opposition two and then you name the three okay today, death, civil rights, political rights. Whoops, okay. It just sounds confident. You know they're not going to say, well, I'd do slightly differently. Confident. To answer your question, I'm going to look at these three elements, these three key points of gender equal of women. Do you ever say women? Yeah, Yeah. Women, women, women. Because it's all women, you know, isn't it? It's not men qualities as women. No. The inequality for women say it. Yeah inequality in America, 127. The suggestion, the main Yeah look, the suggestion that so where's the title? The suggestion. That opposition remained. The same same is clearly. So the main issue my teachers say is like I've talked about what were the oppositions, but I when I was evaluating, I didn't link back to the reasons. So he said I should focus more on the question. Okay. But you don't have to be right. You see, it's funny this, but look at that. Doesn't that sound. Yeah, it makes sense. It's someone who clearly as. Fairly confident. Or I could put by or. So what am I saying is there is some truth. You see by just that change there. Yeah. I think that's the better answer because it shows you, look, some of the opposition did remain the same, but most of it, it did change because it's not supported by the evidence over this period. Now you don't have to be right, but what you're doing is I'm answering your question. I'm making it clear that I'm answering your question. I'm giving you my opinion, which is what you want. How far do you agree? It's not. Do I agree with your opinion that they're not asking, they're not marking it. They just want to know your opinion. And can you provide you know some evidence to support your opinion? I don't have to agree with you. They're not asking, only write what I, what you think I'm going to agree with you. They're not. So you have to write, I like that word you used earlier. I read it somewhere plausible. It's possible. It's possible. You're right. And you make a good case. Hardo you mind like quickly going through the entro because I really want to look at those, go through the introduction because I really want to look at the evaluation because I don't get my teacher's point where he says you're unclear here and he's being nice, a bit hunk. Look at his handwriting. Look at that writing. Yeah. Like like couldn't even read his I say, okay, you could laugh and say, well, I'm glad I can read your writing. So Oh, we've got to be careful there. I don't know where you know, your teaching say, well, I've been I've been lucky. I think if you said something like I'm trying to follow your examples, I think theysee, that's cheeky. All right. Okay. So your first sentence is crucial. All right. And I think it's it's a bit muddled. It's a bit muddled. Not sure not sure how. And I'm not going to put the question. I'm going to put. My question. All right. So it's their question to you. It's not as if it's any old question they want to know. It's my question to you. To you, Alina. And that's how you've responded. Would you really talk like that to them if your teacher asked you that question? Would you actually say that to them? No, no, you see you probably wouldn't talk like that, would you? And then from that, rather not sure about you're then trying to explain it. So you're trying to explain quite a what is already. You can't do it. You can't. If you start off a muddle, it's going to get. Okay, okay. All right. It's got to, hasn't it? You're trying to explain a muddle. Very hard to explain a muddle, but let's see what you've done in response to these changes, the oppositions reasons. I read it out. Yeah, I can. I can. I'm just trying to think I'm going slei want to think from morality and women's capability to their to that note there, women's dependency, dependency on their husband and less on the representation for change to justify their claims. These thus reasons for opposition gradually chawhat, gradually changed. Yeah. So that's it. That's your conclusion. That's my you see. Where's the question there? Do you see what I'm saying here? So that's a huge question, isn't it? You could write a book on this. Honestsay, such a massive gender equality over 127 years, and the reasons didn't change. You could write a huge book on this. Okay? Alina comes along and she can. That's it. That's the answer to the question. How is it on how is it not clear? Let me see where it's so simple, isn't it, is you're making quite a. Oh no, Peter, just ignoore that because you know, they got to look at so many different things about this and 127 years, who's changing their opposition? What are the reasons? What are the reasons that are changing over 127 years? Who's changing their reasons? Why they change and how important is it? So I'm saying the politicians are the more important ones. If their opinion changes, that's more important. So to just sum it up. Thus, reasons for opposition gradually changed. Yeah, that's my argument. It's like you having a life, you living for 127 years. Did Alina change over this 127 years of her life? And you say, yes, the reasons reasons gradually change. Alina gradually changed in her life. Appears changing, appears to change. So many things on there, so much more complicated. You could you know about your life, you know, did Elina change much during her life? If. You're do my looking at my body paragraph. But what I'm trying to say to you is that your rest of your essay should take each each paragraph takes one of the points and goes into detail, develops your argument, okay, gives more information so that you reach the same conclusion. All right, now I'm happy to go to the teacher if you want. The comment I'm also quite interesting. Okay I can type Oh that's for the last question. Sorry. Yeah but I need a level of criteria to support your. Evidence. Evidence. Yeah, that's for the last question. I can type it here for this question. He says focus. Precisize, well, which page is it? It's not the last page, but I can just type it on. No, I'm going to upload it. Major five is. Yeah let's how how are we doing? You've got prayers haven't you gonna go to chapel am you Yeah evening chapel you will go to is it you go to the church do you Yeah we need to stay there for like an hour Oh okay the whole school Oh school even song is it called it even song even now ol, I look at that. And what would I be thinking? Oh, Yeah, I didn't write the conclusion. I didn't have time to write it. You have to. You have to Yeah, but I didn't have time to write it by no power. Peter, if I was running out of time, should I finish off the body paragraph or should I jump to the conclusion? You've got to keep an eye on the clock, but if you you know you can't afford to be running out of time, but if you are, you've got to get to a conclusion. You do need a concluding paragraph and you've got to stay on the line. Here you see this line. You've got gaps here. Basically he said I should focus more precisely on the reason for opposition. Yeah. Yeah. And that, of course, is is of course. Question. It is the main point in the question. Wait, Peter, the reason for opposition is different from oppositions, right? Well, you have reasons for opposition and that means the opposition. You have opposition because of the reasons. Okay? So if the reasons are changing, the reasons for the opposition are changing. Okay. So reason for often is the opposition. So and the question is, did the opposition change? Didn't it? Didn't it the opposition to gender equality change? Well, that means the reasons. That's really what it means, the reasons for this opposition. And that is the question about if the manifestation of opposition change, the reason might not necessarily change, right? I'm not quite sure what you mean by that. I'd to but why give me an example of opposition for gender equality? Let me just summarize this. Gender equality. It's only for women. This topic is only for women. I know, I know. So it means equal rights. But we haven't a yet. So we're talking about women. Okay. And it basically reasons, which is what we you mentioned earlier, the reasons. So why why now this is the question. Yeah so Yeah did the opposition change. So people who said, no, we don't want equal rights, no. The for example, sorry, can I just check on that? It's the opposition. Opposition. So those who said. Women should not be equal to men. Did those reasons change over this period? And that's the focus. That's right. And where must you have that focus? End up tion in the first parotherwise the rest. Because of this this muddle I said do you remember my wrote muddle if you have a muddle Yeah Yeah you can't be focused so so okay do you mind going to like a body paragraph so like we can let's just sorry why would all it is very hard to read okay well it says his writing Yeah that's Yeah it is Yeah okay I will improve you even his even look even his full stops not on the line so and you've got to finish with the full stop I noticed make sure you always have a high volume of it I agree there Yeah so you make your points in the first paragraph in only an outline you don't give details you say look we need to consider this this this and then your last sentence. So clearly the opposition did change over this period particularly when dealing with their political rights. You see, you just say something. They've thought it just shows you've thought more. Okay, okay. And then so let's just take political right? No. So they're saying, no, you can't have women voting no. No, this is terrible. So in other words, let's just take this. They should be paid the same. Yeah, but not the able. To vote. Yeah, so they should be treated equally to men. Okay. Yeah so we agree that they should be paid equal equal pay, but not equal political equality. I'm not quite sure I'm saying this. Okay. So this is one of your points. So you make the point in your first sentence again. Okay. So I'm dealing with the voting and then did this change. I think that's what I've done in my body paragraphs. Well, let's have a look. Let's have a look at your second paragraph, which is here. It's Yeah it's about political right. You see how well you do it. So for political reasons for opposition change gradually after the 19 twenties. So what are we saying here? It changed. It did not remain the same. What it did not change. No, no. I mean the reason for opposition changed. They didn't Oh Yeah Yeah that's what Yeah you see so remember that the question said 1860 and you've said, well, they changed after 1920 so they didn't change but for half half the period. But Yeah, the isn't the question asking for the whole period. It is asking for it throughout. Okay. I see what you mean. I see what you mean, but you're missing an opportunity here. Well, for the first 60 years of this period, it didn't change. The reasons remained the same. However. All right, how far do I agree? Well, they remain the same for half this period. And you've kind of ignored that, haven't you? I can see what you're saying throughout this period. I can see that you're saying, well, it doesn't matter if it's stathe same because like, if it's change or change, I think simple. I mean, do you want to make it clear stristudents make it sound, Oh, is this simple? People write books on and they disagree. The experts disagree. And you're trying to make this gradually after well, they didn't change them for 60 years of this period. And then you're saying gradually, okay, only sure. Incapacity to vote, incapability. No, they're not incapable. They're not allowed to. It's not being identiand. They're not allowed to because the men think they are not capable. It's a reason. I'm not sure that's quite the right word, but it could be to vote. Sorry, from women's incomparative vote like more to their view. Now let's go back to the point I was making. The first sentence of each paragraph is crucial. Okay, so I said, was that from a woman's incapability to vote like meto their to their view, already represented by their husband? I'm thinking, what is that all about? Like the reason changed from women's were incapable to the point that woman's view were already represented. Those were two reasons. Is this so we're talking about political equality? Yeah, Yeah, Yeah. So for political equality, this is very important part of this essay. Yeah women's equality, women's political equality. Okay? And it didn't and the question is it didn't change in this period. And this is your answer, basically the first sentence where I'm really going to talk about this whole idea of women's political equality with men. Okay? This is the first sentence. This is the main. This is it the key. First, what have I done? Run here. What are you saying? The reasons changed because they moved from the reason that women were incapable to vote to the fact that their views, woman's view, were already represented by their husband. So both of them means that women don't need to vote. And I come back to what I said, Elina, is, does that is that the key point? Is that really sort of summarizing it all? I think so that is something like, I think in past that's what I'm argubut. Is it? Yeah. Is that getting to the sorry, is that getting to the. I think so. Because it's all about like voting representations. Okay, have you heard of this word nub? No, no, it's the same like the heart you get to the heart, the nub the nub of the issue here, you know the heart of this issue. So what would I say? What would I be saying politically, political equality, you know you really want to get to the heart of this whole question about was the opposition to women having equal political rights the same the same throughout this period? That's that's the answer. That's the question, isn't it? So here's my answer in this paragraph. I've only got one paragraph on this. So in my first sentence, I've got to try and summarize summarize it in my first sentence. And then the rest of the paragraph is going into detail on my first sentence. All right, so my question to you was, is your first sentence really summariising the key points about political equality, the reasons for the opposition to women being equal to men over this period? Is your first sentence kind of answering that? Yeah, I'm just laying up views. Well, Peter, do you understand one thing here? Like there was one reason women were incapable to vote, so they couldn't vote. There's a second reason, because their views were already represented by their husband, and men could always vote, so womdon't need to vote at all. Yeah, I see your point now. I was misinterpreting it. I see what people said was, well, your husband's voting, so he's voting Yeah, exactly. Behalf exactly. I see what you mean. I was I thought your husband views was and that's you know you've got a husband and his views are the ones that matter. Oh, I get you is but not see I don't think that's the key thing here though. I think the the key thing is the men are in charge and they don't want women. The men at the dinner in charge that they want to lose it, but that's the reason it's the same everywhere. If you've got power, you don't want to share it unless you have to all right. I'm afraid it's like your your leader in China, what's he doing at the moment? According to the newspapers? But he's he wants to keep power. Yeah and he's making sure he does. Yeah you know he's not gonna to share power. No, thank you very much. And of course, the men say, well, we've got power. We're not gonna to share it. You know it's not just against the women. It was, it used to be the rich people, the rich, only the rich people in England could vote. And they said, we're not going to share votes with the poor. No, we're not. We're going to keep it ourselves until eventually they had to, they were forced to. All right. So and it's this whole question you're answering rather than, Oh, people thought, wait, what are you saying here? The views did change. Use changed changed gradually and then you got after nine from women's incapability to vote like more to their view, like now represented by their husbands. It's not very clear. Do you okay, period. Staras, we only have ten minutes. Do my like going to my evidence thingy. Sorry. Just like after that here. Yeah, I know. Like my just my body paragraph after the sentence timent, so it's the next page, is it? No, no it's the Green bit the Green bit still on this page Yeah bei don't have to change so where here here here just continue that one nevertheless so now sorry Lena Yeah you see you're now going to comment I think or develop the point here or the point Oh Yeah sorry Peter we we have to follow that structure because my teacher gave me I agree I agree but that's why this has to be spot on. Oh Yeah, that's actually really has to be a lot better, a lot more yothese. This is what we need to be talking about. We need to be for political rights. We need to be talking about these things. And did they change over this period? That's that's what we want to get into. Okay? We want to get into that. Make it clear, right? So as far as political rights, as far as political equality was concerned, the reasons for opposing political equality largely remained the same throughout this period, or sorry, the same for the first up to the sixth 19 twenties. But then the reasons gradually changed. So that's the first sentence. Then we can look at gc, then we look at the reasons for the first 60 years, which could be one or two sentences. And then now we can look at the changes after the 19 twenties and provide the evidence. So we got changing reasons after now so before 19, 20 people people were happy they because they felt that women, their views were represented by their husbands but it's just not it's more than that isn't it? Yeah, it's as if there's any one reason Oh, we're not we don't want you having equal rights because your views are represented by your husband. That's it. It's more than that isn't it? Okay, so you need to, you kind of need to say that now let's deal with after 98, it gradually changed. Is that the word? We're not really that's not the is that the important thing? Gradually will you put gradually, as if that's the key point, reasons for that gradually changed ined. Now is this the question? No, the question is they changed. No, you see, you're saying they gradually changed, but the question was, did they remain the same or did they try to change? So what you're saying after they did change, okay, they were gradual. Okay, that's all. Okay, they were gradual, but they did change from the 19 twenties onwards. And then you can talk. So do I need to say gradual? No. Oh, we can. But your first sentence is saying, as if graduals the answer, the reasons change gradually. The question is, did they change? So the answer is yes, they did change, even though it was only. You don't have to say that even they did change, not quickly, but they did change. And then you want to say they changed in this respect. Get on with it. Why did they change? He got to get on with it. Now, they changed after the 90 hundred, even though it was quite gradual, but they changed in this respect. So by 1992, the situation, the opposition was. Changed very, very different. No, friend, there's your answer. So for politically okay, first 60 years, not much change, but change began. And by 1992, it was very different from. From 1865. Am I answering the question now? Is the focus good? Yeah where's your teacher saying this focus pido you mind looking at my arguments? Sorry. Do my keeps looking down at my like counter argument and evidence. Where where's this now? Yeah, just that one. Yeah. Yeah, me. Okay. Well, you read it then you read it. Okay. Nevertheless, there is a case for arguing arguably, sorry, that reasons for opposition. Has not changed. This is because women continued, seeing as it was not changed, this as a counter argument, women continued seen as incompetent and temporary member of political life, then methroughout the period, I would say this period, okay, throughout this period, okay, 1928, even after the Fourteenth Amendment that allowed women, this Nineteenth Amendment to allowed women to vote showing federal government recognition of women's, you've suddenly introduced that. You see, I think there's a better way of doing that. You start with the date. I was wondering why you, why you're choosing a date, right? What are we saying here? There's a case for the opposition. Had changed or not changed. Had not changed. This is like the counter argument. Okay, not changed. I'm not sure you've said that they look, had not changed, not never change. Case for arguing what? But you just said, well, sorry, pithat's, the structure, I need to follow it. Okay, I understand that. I think you need to show that first, prove that and then say, well, hang on here. Having said there might be a change after and these, this is what we're talking about. Then we say, but there's also a case for saying, well, the changes are not. You know significant not change. No, not change. Yeah. So I think that's what I would have done. Think so when I work. That's your key point. I think you've got to say no, nothing changed up to 90. The reasons were the same. But after 1920, I don't think you could say they gradually changed and then say, well, there's a counter argument. They didn't. What appear that the structure. I know your teacher does that and I do I do get that. But you've got to I just think you can't say one thing and then say, well, it might not be. It just seems a bit strange. Okay. I would say, look, there is an argument. Look, so what I would say then is, but there is an argument that the opposition the reasons for opposition grad changed. Or although gradually, you know, after 1920, although there is still an argument that on these key political issues, women's rights did not change a great deal, that made a difference. Okay. So you say you've done the counter argument as well as saying, well, these are the changes. I think that's a better way of doing it. I think your teacher would agree with that. I don't think saying one thing and then immediately saying, well, it's not it might not be is a bit odd. Yeah, I think your teacher would agree. It just depends how you freeze it. So you know, there is a case that after summarizing, there is a case that from the 1920, the reasons did change, particularly as the you know, in a gradual way, although there are still is still an argument that on the key point, it wasn't a great deal of actual change, you know, so you. Okay you can't you've got to really think these things through to makes sense that makes sense like less spend more time really what is going to be my answer director working out what is going to be my answer to this question. What am I going what are the key points am I gonna to highlight and then make sure your first paragraph sets it out. Without going into huge detail, an outline, then each of the points in your first graph, your first paragraph, you become your second paragraph, your third paragraph, your fourth and then your conclusion. Okay? And that's so makes sense. The first sentence of each paragraph is your first first sentence on each of the key points you've said. I need to give you more information because these are the key points in answering your question. So you come on to the first of those key points. If it's political rights, far as political rights were concerned over this period, there was very little change for the first 60 or so years, but there was arguably some change, however gradual, from the 19 twenties, even though there are still there's still an argument that those changes were not significant counterarguing, isn't it? There you are. First sentence. Yeah, how about that? You're always focused on the question, you see, which is what anyway, you need to go and say a few prayers. It's okay, Peter. Know we can I can I can leave in like two minutes. Okay okay. All tiwhat are you going to say for your first paragraph now, first, you mean introduction were my called introduction? Everyone does, but what it makes you do is it makes you waffle. You see, so I think it's just an introduction. Oh, I can just gently. So it's not an introduction, although your teacher will call it that. Okay. So I can say you want your answer to the point. Okay. And that's not an introduction, is it? So the reason for so you're okay e points. And that overall, one answered the point, raised the question and outline. Key points over one. What do you mean overall one? Well, the overall one is, remember the big one. How far do I agree? Okay. So the key points here obviously are quality. And we said that means probably three areas. Yeah, Yeah, it's record three, whatever you want, three eras. You've got political, social, employment. So we're looking here at probably three areas of gender equality. You've got to tell the reader, this is this. These are the areas I've got to look at to answer your question. You want me to do it over 127 years? Blime, thanks a lot. And then you want to say, do I agree? Lie me. So you see, and I should do that in the first paragraph, and I should give an outline of my thoughts. And you can call it your judgment. Sometimes we call it judgment. Okay. Or your opinion or your views or your assessment, your analysis. So I think or your evaluation. It's all the same. He's just giving your answer. What do I think? What do I think of this? It's a complex. It's not easy. It's very difficult. This, and you've only given me 45 minutes. Lie me. It is incredibly hard this, when people can write books and still disagree. The experts disagree, and they want you to do it in about 45, 50 minutes. So you, my teacher, think this is a difficult question. It is, you've got to get the first paragraph clear, so reader can understand your thoughts. You know or you know this word, don't you? Your criteria? How you will judge. Okay, you know what are we going to talk about here? Equality, right? We're going to talk about these three key areas. We're talking about gender core. We've got three key areas to look at over 127 years. But the question says it didn't change. So I'm kind of do you see where you're going? Yeah. If the question said, well, they they did change to some extent. Oh, well, that's a different question. This question is they didn't change at all. So the answer is I disagree. You know that's the answer, isn't it? Now of course they changed, but which are the key ones that changed? How much did they change? But the question says they didn't change at all. So my answer is no, that's not that's they did change. But you know I've got to say, well, did they change a lot or not? Or when. But overall, how far do I agree with the question? I don't it said they remained the same. Oh, sorry, the question for the first 60 years, remember political. Though up to 19 twenties on the political equality, they did remain the same. All right. So I agree there. I'm answering the question all the time. Do you see? Sorry, Peter, may I ask a question? Like let me the question it's like opposition reason for opposition change but like the large reason remained the same but there was like some several small reasons but not that important reasons. Would you say reasons still remain ined the same? Not well, good because it's not saying it's just saying the reasons. It's not saying the important reasons. Yeah. So it's up to you. It just says the reason. It doesn't reasons. It's up to you it says the reasons okay, that makes sense but being clever you think, well Yeah the reasons for opposition some are in much more important than others show the readshow the marker I realize they're not all equal but put the gender equality in the ui realized some are more important than the others said he's say, Oh, here's a student dent's thinking is this student thinking or are they just writing rubbish? Students will write rubbish. No I'm sorry Peter. I think I have to go. Oh you better say a few prayers. Yes okay bye bye then Yeah you too say a few prayers. Thank you so much. See you. Bye bye bye. Have a lovely evening. Bye bye.