Hello, hear you all. How are you? Good. Good. For some reason, the homework has disappeared off of here. All of the homework that I've set you has disappeared. I don't know what is going on, will you send the homework? Who ecgo? I sing. I think because there's two they've got two classes for us. So it's on here. Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? I don't know what's going on. Hang on, I'm just going to send a message about this because I need to sort this out. Okay. Right? I will just have to upload the homework from my phone. Oh, my goodness, and I can't find it. Oh, my gosh. Okay, okay, okay, I've got it. I've got it. All I'm going to upload this. In the lesson. Okay, here we go. Finally. Oh, my goodness. A long time, didn't it, just to get this homework? So we've got the Jones in co circus. This is the homework. I now not fine. There we go. Yes. Hey, good. You could also talk about this. He's saved almost all the full cost of the ticket. Also talk about that. Which thing is like it's happening to Tom as not allowed? I think he will sneak to the circus and break in if he wasn't allowed together because he is eager. Yes, sneak into part of the story that this extrcomes from is the greatest state. What does this touch tell you about may have in the plot? This needs a little bit more description in recoyou can't, we can't just say, Oh, the title grade escape tells me that therebe a great escape. That is a little bit cheating, a little bit thatwould be like saying, Oh, the title Harry Potter tells me that therebe a boycott Harry Potter. You know, you know, it's like, what do you think will escape? You know, for example, maybe a animal will escape from the circus or something. Something like that would be a better answer. Yeah. Okay. I can't mark that because we're not in the lesson with that homework, so I'll just have to send that separately. Okay, third day. Okay, today we are looking at story plots. Trying to read this slide for me. Actually, I'll read it. What is a story plot? The plot is what happens in a story. We talked about that a bit me, little story mountain stuff. However, a plot is not a simple sequence of events. A strong plot is centred on one moment, an interruption of a pattern, a turning point for an action that raises a dramatic question, which be, which must be answered throughout the of the in. Literature, the turning point, or we also call the supply max and know at the very top of the story mountain is the point of highest tension in a narrative. It is the most exciting and revealing part of a story. It leads the rising action into the falling action before a story is resolved and reaches the conclusion. Okay, Enrico, are you listening to me? Yeah, Yeah. Why are we over there? Why are why are we looking at something else? Okay, thank you. Still looking over there. What you tell me then what is a story plot a story for mate? You see what a story told he will be about? Okay, good. What about the turning point? The turning point is where. The story turns from exciting to do. Not necessarily. Why would a writer want there to be a part where it goes from exciting to dull? That tells me that we weren't quite listening to what I just read. So you can read this slide for me now as well, please. Oh, the turning point of close is the point of high attention on the narrative is the most exciting, revealing part of the story. It leus in rising action into a full action before the story through saw and reaches on conclusion. There you go. So it's not about it. It's becoming boring and dull. It's just that it's you know going towards the ending. So here we have we're going to read an extra from a story called the curse of, I should say, podston house rather than Boston. Some pre reading questions. What does the title tell you about the story? There is a cause, sin, death. Yes, I could. And there will be a place called the Coster house. Yes, exactly. The fact it's a curse, you know, what type of story might this be? Fiction a fiction, Yeah, but what kind of genre? Aventure. Yeah, but like do you think maybe it's going to be a bit spooky if there's a curse? Yeah, I think so, because can you guess what the story is going to be about? So what do you think might happen? Hard to guess at this point, isn't it? Yes, I think therewill be if you over his cast. So you think people are going to be cursed? Yeah. Hmm, okay, let's see. Okay, you're going to read for me in Rico. Alice ran a finger on the smooth edge of a beautifully onic carriage cloak and found not a scrap of that t on the surface. It she looked up at the phthy mortal glass of the ground floor windows and back at the sligleaming bullish face of the clock. Few moments later, on both girls Reback cca on the main corridor, eliice Eliza stopped walking. Suddenly. She turned her head slightly to the left. Hot listen, she was heard. At least still. And song too, she looked bad. The circuit treup the line of the banstnow towards a dark vacuum above it was impossible to photofor with. And into the top there's spjust for a second and be sure that something can be among smile hundo figure nobody wanted did figure hovering just beyond the last, barely visible. The remember the shomust be listening. I don't think I hear anything, I exactly red Green, no thinking. What others realized, what was listening for behind presence or something? What away, what. Some of velous at the nearest grandfather club, the latest in a lonely standing at the dark panthat's why I know other sounds so far, other clock so far had been walking through even as far as Alhad noticed, showing the correct time. And now 1031, looking back, at least over her clotheither, three hours or nine hours behind the correct time. And I just seem to contemplate this for a moment, and then just says, suddenly, if the cohad attracted her hard days, she looks injust and move on down the hallway. The same. And the happhad a moment earlier. But I know where to be seen. Alstired up at the clock a little longer something about science crisis she could put hand. On in her head, she Reher the police will the pis listening for both the of second. Poor. What's? Warning an air splitting spthe Silas, this. As I have been creeping, creeping father, on the passage with a horrendous Sahas, started to find herself perfectly long in an empty hole. It lies sweet its and taught from confusion to panic, and also apparently frozing by herself, by her, as you can to viably shaand avengers is whiout of her. She was meekly Alice, wiping her body around for its side to side. She's foragain this time, not the more utly Alice. Eliza the of Hong Kong was increasingly in different directions he died ved in the doubt ta of the nearest room what I wanted it to be still the abandoned Alice Alice. Frantically it lies, the screalice is then again, then the gfeathers from her eyes she took one more across little right that battered down hoand elside bded up ping. Okay. Very. I could hear the tension and sort of citement in your books that you were reading it. So it says, is there a turning point in this story versus is. I'm. Sorry to that again. What a bang happens. Okay, Yeah when that's sort of we've got that big bang, I would argue that all of this is still very kind of exciting, though we're probably still at the climax even in this part. So perhaps we haven't quite got the turning point of the story yet. So what what it does have though is lots of tension. How would you describe what tension is? Tenmeans the means, the encouragement to make people read on. Okay. Why don't you read what it says in these boxes? Passion is a something that reers used to create a problem. And the story tension, you feel worry. Fear, not pressure. You can also make tension between and as if they argue. Good. So it's actually not same. It doesn't I guess you're right, it does help a reader to want to read on, doesn't it? Because it gets also exciting and almost like, Oh, it's so much so tense. Like maybe you'll feel worried for the character or you're a bit scared for them. Yeah, good. We also want to make sure that we have a lot of suspense as well. How would you describe suspense? 那。Us the wind with the hunched long food figure about steps. I can't almost feel I feel cold in my bag. You want to read what it says? Suspense is something using stories to make the mysterious or scary suspense means so waiting for something to have or being uncertain about what I want. Good. Okay. We're actually going to have to I'm going to give a different task, I think, have a go at this here. Hang on. Hang on, rii'm just going to get PowerPoint talto some of these features because the PowerPoint is already finished. So we're going to need to get some extra work. So we'll have a look through the different features that we want to use when writing a story to create suspense intention. It just needs to open up. Why is it being so slow? Okay. So we're going to go through the features that we mean when we're writing a suspense and tension. So for example, here we've got an extract from the cursa cogson house that we were just looking at. We've got Alice couldn't move and she was scared. Then a man started to walk downstairs towards her. It says, this isn't very scary because we know exactly who is coming down the stairs straight away. The descriptions aren't detailed. We know that Alice is scared, but you know, we don't really feel scared with her. It's all just too plain. It's very dull and boring, isn't it? Instead, this description here is much, much more interesting. Did we read this part as part of the extracact that you just read in Rico? Do you recognize this? Then move coand houwell, that's a great, we, the only thing was their hand of restaurant. The first colleagues are namwith allowthis in quiet Alices such a. Thought morning place in room all the time. 那。Through the太。Grace your Smith wither. Almost in her mouth and her breath came in shock, breathing gas descending the zero one, careful analyzing, creaking Stat, the time 100. That is scary, yes. So how does it make you feel? It makes you feel scared. Yes, so it says, even though not much is happening to Alice, there is a lot of descriptive detail about the surroundings. All of this writing means that the reader can clearly picture what Alice is experiencing, and they have to wait a long time before they can find out what happens to her. Even at the end of the extract, the reader still doesn't know who is coming down the stairs. It asks, why not? Because it only says a hunch silhouette. It can be any hunch silhouette. But why aren't they telling us? Do you think so? Great suspense? Mm, yes, create suspense. Good, makes it feel more exciting. So keeping things hidden makes the reader want to keep reading and find out more. The text also uses some short, sharp sentences to shock the reader. In these short sentences, giving the reader no details at all is scary. It's a bit like being in the dark, like this thing here. Something was moving. You know, like that is a bit creepy, isn't it? Yes, well, the lord, I really want to know now. We also get extra information through subordinate and relative clauses, again, to make the reader wait even longer. These ones here, as she look bking through the tears descending the stairs, one careful, agonizing, creaking step at a time. Just almost painful, isn't it? Yes. And that creates suspense for the readers. Yeah, exactly. The low. What was that in? So that again, what was that silhouette? Yes, we've got more still questioning who, who who is this? We even have a special piece of punctuation used. We have these three dots here, actually used twice. It says these three dots together is called an ellipsis. And an ellipsis shows that something is coming next. It's like a drumball. It's like like that. Yes, sometimes it might be that the end of the sentence is missing as well. Also, instead of just you know telling us straight away Alice was scared, the author shows us that Alice Alice's body is doing instead. So from these blue and Rico, how do you know that she's scared? She, she was, her horse was in her mouth, and her breast came in sharbread ling ass. It's like she's going in it, like she's breathing very fast. What else can we see? My teachcall show, I don't say, but I provided call show and tell without tell. Yes, exactly. This is show and not tell, isn't it? We're showing, you know, her tears, her heart, her breath, her feelings, you know, feeling like she's numb, turning to stone. W, this is telling us, we can infer then how she is feeling. But also, we want to make sure we're using a description of the five pencers. It says, can you find sights, sounds and feelings in this text if you think you could highlight them for me? I give you the pen. Think it has hallighted already. Oh, so you're just telling me, are they sight sounds or feeling descriptions? Oh, so red. How can I exterminated? If you change it to a highlighter, then when you do it, it will the light, the writing will come underneath. 好的。Very good. Yes, we've got some feelings, mainly sights and sounds, but we're still using a range, which is what we want. Okay? Also, instead of just using you know, boring verbs like walk, we've got much more exciting synonyms to show how this man was moving. We've got these careful, agonizing freaking steps, shuffling, descending. You know, it's almost like it creates a bit of a rhythm with that ing ing ing as well. Just feels so slow and creepy, doesn't it, imagining this? Yes. Okay, it also says the describing words in this extract are interesting and imaginative. Why do you think it is important to describe these events in detail? Yeah. It is important because. As you don't describe. We cook some with that silent. The. Thing was that her best friend, calling her name, was being alone in his quiet and said to the darkkness, scoring the corridor, which faded into a warm gloom, she could make how the hole is right in front of her, the door opposite and beyond it a staircase, as she look looking king through the terrace. I wish I going to swing down her face. She was well with us. At the top of the case, Alice watched her in her mouth, and her her birth came in us one step at a time. You don't need to read it all again. You don't need to read it all again. I still worjufall out from the darkness. This is much more borroing. Yeah. Okay, we've also got imagery. We've got a simile comparing the science of the house. We've got a metaphor, you know we know that Alice isn't actually turned to stone, but it just shows that she was too afraid to move. We've got some on a matpier as well, rattling, creaking, shuffled. So much description here. You're gonna to have a go for me reading this extract. You can read it first for me. And then you're gonna to find some examples of each of those things. Could you read it out loud for me? And Sandon swirling in his ththis, really his waltried to wash away her friends and desert in the center ter her other have passed. Every second he hesitated, Jack edge further away. I've I'm here. It was each horrendous night. Look, as briwho can, okay, he was pending. Now where was it coming from? See only was filling him from to ket and behind his head to travel和source的noise kick jacks。Hash. His hand and go as the auto oxygen or being so automatic, there is it's just I upon an explanation, the high wind that year noticed earlier a coof, while a long branunch was swn around arithmatically in the breeze. Good rhythmically. So you're going to find these examples for me in the text. We'll use the highlighter. It's another extra from the coast of it is Yeah in the poxen house Yeah. This one, you'll have to just underline black. 没。So many dots. Okay, I got dot we got all of them is the tick tick is that showing the on a matappear? Yeah, okay. Oh. Yes, it looks. What about what about any clues? And any detailed descriptions of the surroundings. Didn't find any of those. Yes, so detailed descriptions of the surroundings may perhaps like you know the breeze. Or even a high window. Is that the same color? Not sure. Maybe. Clues. The horrendous noise that can be a clue. Yeah costed by a long branch. The rhythmic moving but Yeah good. We've got short sentences fronted verbials. Good ellipses, yes. Physical reactions, breathing, panting, good. The senses so purple for the sensors that would be like sandstorm swirling. He's got a noise. Noise Stoy flashed oxygen being sucked out of him hearing the breeze Yeah, these are all different sensors suryms horrendous dither Yeah similes had the sunsons were swirling good. Part in his mouth that would also be a metaphor, sorry. And then we've got that tick, tick being the honattapiyeah good. Okay. Right, well done. Good work and Rico. Your next Thursday. Yeah, let me just set your homework. History homework sheet that has been prepared for you. I'm just going to take that off because I haven't got of mystery. So it says a billionaire has been found murdered in his mansion. The murder weapon, poison. But who poisoned him? A detective is called to the crime scene to investigate. The story this was and how the mystery is. So yes, so just a short story and I wouldn't expect it to be too long or maybe just write what you've got time to do because you know I understand you've we've got lots of other homework to do as well. Right. Well done, Enrico. So next week is our last lesson before the Christmas break, so won't see you for a couple of weeks after next week. Next week we will be moving on to explore the story. Ywriting skill, I think flashfacts, so I'll read some examples and have a go at doing some of those. Okay, right. Rodon and Rico, good work. Today I look forward to reading your story and finding out what's happened to the murdered man. Thank you, bye bye.